Survivor: Fiji - The Season Finale

I was away on business last Thursday, but I finally caught the episode of Survivor that I missed this past weekend and wow, it was a doozy! I can't say how happy I am that Yau-Man decided to play the Idol to save himself. Now I just that he or Earl end up winning the prize money. Now on the the 2 hour season ending spectacular (it better be spectacular, dammit!):

- Earl suspects everyone voted for Yau-Man just to flush out the Idol

- Yau-Man suggests that if he doesn't win immunity at the next challenge, he may have to "borrow" Earl's Idol...which Earl, seems very hesitant about doing

- Cassandra, Dreamz and Boo have apparently banded together despite everyone wanting Boo out last week

- Immunity Challenge: each person must make their way through a massive, 5-section maze while blindfolded. Each person will be wearing a uniquely shaped medallion. At a station in the maze, they will have to feel different molds to find the one that matches their medallion. If they match correctly, they will get a key that will lower a drawbridge allowing them to crossover to the next section, and so on

- Everyone starts bumping into each other really hard

- Yau-Man gets off to a really good lead early on

- Cassandra is wandering aimlessly in a big open space

- Boo and Dreamz are about tied for second place behind Yau-Man. Earl and Cassandra have no hope of catching up

- YES! Yau-Man wins immunity!

- Yau wants Boo to be voted out and everyone seems on board, but Dreamz is unsure of his safety. However, Boo approaches Earl and tells him he'd stand a better chance against him in the final and suggests voting out Dreamz. Boo them also approaches Yau

- Dreamz takes offense when Boo suggests he'll get the "sympathy vote"

- Earl plays the Immunity Idol even though he doesn't need to, but it's the last time he'll be able to

- Boo is voted out 4 to 1

- Aww, Earl and Yau share a bromantic moment

- Dreamz says he intends to uphold his end of the deal he made with Yau

- YAWN! Time for a walk (or rather, a float) down memory lane as everyone paddles down a river to collect the torches of their fallen tribemates. The only cool part is when they toss all the torches on the a boat and set it on fire

- Final Immunity Challenge: Each person must lie on a plank on their backs while holding onto a wooden handle above their head. Every five minutes the angle of the plank while increase. From the start, water will also start pouring onto them, making things slippery

- Cassandra is the first to fall after 15 minutes when Jeff increases the angle from 45 to 50 degrees. From the sound of it, she seems to have had an orgasm on her way down

- Earl falls next at a 55 degree angle

- Yau-Man falls next. Dreamz wins the last individual immunity

- Everyone is very surprised that there is going to be a final 3, even though it happened last season

- It seems so wrong that everyone is expecting Dreamz to give up immunity but are then planning on voting him out

- No one really knows what Dreamz is planning to do...not even Dreamz

- WHOA!!! Dreamz keeps the Immunity Necklace!

- I'm actually happy he did. Sure, he's the biggest liar of the bunch, but Dreamz needs the money more than the others do

- Yau-Man is voted out 3-1

- Aww, Yau seems hurt that Earl voted for him

- Cassandra reveals she discarded her underwear 3 weeks ago. Nice

- The final 3 take a walk and discover a basket with wineglasses, silverware, and a note that says a gift will be dropped from the sky. The crate with food lands in the ocean and Earl has to dive out to get it

- Before heading to the final Tribal Council, the final 3 make a bonfire in their cave

- Dreamz likens being in the finals to standing next to Oprah. I can totally understand that

- Earl makes his case to the jury first. He says he played a smart, clean game. Notes that no one ever voted for him. He doesn't want the sympathy vote or the underdog vote; he wants the respect vote

- Cassandra makes her very weak case

- Dreamz decides not to rehash his life story since he's already done it so many times. On to the jury questions...

- Michelle's question is boring

- Ed asks Earl to reveal how he found out about the Four Horsemen's Idol. He outs Dreamz

- After Mookie's question, it really doesn't seem like Dreamz can expect any votes from Ed, Mookie and probably Alex

- Alex is a dick to Cassandra. Wow, what an asshole! Then he moves on to Dreamz and continues being a sore loser. At least he spares Earl

- Lisi tells Cassandra she has ugly water shoes. Huh?! Then she asks Dreamz how many zeroes are in a million, then acts surprised when he gets it right. What a fucking bitch!

- Stacy tries to figure out the difference between Earl and Dreamz, other than their level of sophistication

- Rocky...sigh...apparently, once a douche, always a douche

- Boo applauds Yau-Man and knocks Dreamz for going back on his word. Then he plays the Christian Card...oh no he di'int! Jeez...if ever there was any doubt that Boo hailed from a Bible Belt red state, tonight settled that

- Yau-Man takes responsibility for Dreamz betrayal. Dreamz says he always intended to keep the immunity. Earl says he didn't take Dreamz to the finals because he knew he would lose

- Time to vote, though we of course won't know the winner until the live finale

- Jeff makes his not-so-dramatic return to the U.S. What ever happened to the boats and the helicopters and all that crazy shit? What a letdown

- Everyone seems to have cleaned up nicely

- Earl gets the first vote, and the second, and the third...do we have a sweep on our hands?

- EARL WINS!!!