Family Guy - "Blue Harvest, Parts 1 and 2" (aka "The Star Wars Episode") - Episode 601

Oh, this oughta be good - but probably not as good as the "Robot Chicken" Star Wars special. The Griffins are watching golf (as the commentators go on and on about the golfer's wife and her nice rack) and the power goes out. Brian suggests they "light candles and read", which elicited peals of laughter from everyone. Peter suggests telling a story, Star Wars ("Let's start with part 4.") We're then treated to a familiar scroll across the screen, which sums up all of the movies in a few paragraphs (and now my husband wants to watch "Gia".) Darth's ship has a Bush/Cheney sticker on the back. It's basically the Star Wars we all know and love, with some rather creative casting. Quagmire and Cleveland are C3PO and R2D2. Lois is Princess Leia, having difficulty recording her message to Obi Wan ("All I'm trying to do is make an mpeg.") Of course, Stewie plays Darth Vader. Lois/Leia tells him the plans are hidden in a briefcase a la "Deal or No Deal". We get a Grey Poupon joke as two Jawa vehicles pull up next to each other. Darth Stewie meets with his cronies (One of whom is Adam West) and discovers a rather serious design flaw with the Death Star ("There's a litle hole..." "Can we board it up?") 

As C3PO Quagmire leaves the Jawa vehicle, he says goodbye to the early 90s printer he just had sex with. Chris is playing Luke, who wants to joins the rebellion to his aunt's dismay ("over my burned carcass"). As Chris/Luke looks out over the horizon, Chris introduces John Williams and his orchestra, providing the swelling music. Chris then asks them to play the "Peoples Court" theme. Chris discovers Lois' message and finds Obi Wan (played by creepy old Herbert). Chris is introduced to the light saber - everyone in the neighborhood has one (one industrious gent is using his as a bug zapper.) Chris returns to his burnt home and notices that John Williams and the orchestra were also lost in the fire. He's replaced by Danny Elfman, who Chris beheads with the light saber. In the cantina (where we get a cameo from "American Dad"'s Roger and Futurama's Bender) we meet Han Solo (played by Peter) and Chewbacca (Brian). Ambiguously sexuality guy Roger plays Gredo. Han Peter uses a maneuver to shake the baddies - listing lazily to the left and jumps to light speed. Peter notes that hyperspace "looks so freaky" - out the window is the opening of the 1970s "Dr. Who". (That was a good one, as was the pimped out tie fighter.) Darth Stewie blows up Leia's planet, which leads to a discussion of 2 Death Star employees complaining about the lack of railings on the Star.

The gang come out of hyperspace and into an asteroid field (and out the window, the classic video game. Sweet.) Of course, they get abducted and are tractor beamed onto the Death Star (with valets). Han Peter told them to act cool, and they saunter by the stormtroopers to the tune of "Minnie the Moocher". Obi Herbert heads off to turn off the tractor beam, but first he serenades Chris with "I've Had the Time of My Life", complete with stormtrooper back-up dancers. Peter, Chris and Brian are lost, so they consult the Death Star map, which looks suspiciously like a mall directory. They head up to find Lois in the elevator (which played a muzak version of the Imperial March. Classic.) Chris rescues Lois and the gang head down the garbage chute. (And we finally see Meg, as the creature who dwells in the garbage.) Just like in the movie, the walls close in, but the gang gets rescued. Peter finds a "whole couch, in great shape" in the garbage and he and Brian have quite a time attempting to get it out of the garbage compartment. Obi Herbert shuts off the tractor beam, and has his confrontation with Darth (his light saber was limp until Chris showed up. It's an erection joke! Get it?) Everybody returns to the Falcon to escape, and again Peter's having problems with the couch.

Chris is despondent after Obi's death, but has little time to grieve as the tie fighters are in pursuit (or is it Thai fighters?) Cleveland shoots at a tie fighter with a handgun ("That's how we do it in my neighborhood, bitch.") Chris shoots one of the enemy ships and Peter tells him not to get "penis-y". Into the fray comes Leslie Nielsen with his line from "Airplane!", "I just want to tell you both good luck, and we're all counting on you."

We're now at the preparation for the rebellion's destruction of the Death Star. All of the pilots are first made to watch the instructional film "Attacking the Death Star with Magic Johnson." Peter gets his reward and leaves (the reward included 10% off a Netflix membership, cheese, lotions, jellybeans, a stuffed bear and a light saber cheese knife.) The x-wing fighters are in formation and are ready to attack, including Red Buttons, Helen Reddy, Redd Foxx, Big Red gum, Red October and Simply Red. We even get cameos from Beverly D'Angelo and Chevy Chase as the Griswolds, taking the kids to see the plight of the rebellion. Second "Airplane!" reference, "The Death Star's getting closer. And Leia's getting laaaarger!" Of course, Han Peter and Chris save the day, and Peter's story comes to an end. Of course, as Chris notes, "Robot Chicken" did the "Star Wars" thing a few months ago. See you next week!