Law & Order: SVU - Svengali (Episode 189)

A professional woman is running for an elevator trying to escape from a pursuer in the shadows. Just as the elevator door closes safely behind her a hand reaches out and stops it and then he joins her in the elevator. Luckily, he looks like someone that is just trying to rush home to get online to play Everquest for the next 15 hours. After dismissing the dork's coffee invite the woman exits the elevator but falls down because the elevator is jammed between floors. As she reaches down to retrieve her purse she finds a mutilated body wedged in the elevator shaft.

Detectives Benson and Elliot arrive on the crime scene. The woman is dressed like she is going to a sorority social. She is dirty, has been strangled with her own pantyhose, and both of her boobs had been cut off. Luckily, she is carrying ID but also a set of lock picks. Her name is Tina Snow and she is a college student with a record for Breaking and Entering. She has GBH in her system but the rape kit reveals that she wasn't raped. Her boobs were chopped post mortum. They interview her roommate who tells them that she was into "freaky" stuff and stayed out all night and often returned home "dirty".

A dirt analysis by the Sugar Ray lookalike that does all of the rape-related science experiments on this show reveals that it is the dirt found in Subway tunnels. The crime lab is also able to decipher the writing off of a burnt piece of paper that is an appointment card for an abandoned subway stop.

Chester, Fin, Elliot, and Olivia all grab their flashlights and Hardy Boys detective kits and take to the tunnels. They stumble upon a private movie screening by an underground "adventure" group. They apprehend the leader of this group, Captain Mayhem aka Edgar Rubinowitz. Edgar, or Capt. Mayhem tells the detectives that his group uses New York as their playground and search for adventure on rooftops and abandoned buildings. He is disturbed to hear of Tina's murder and tells the detectives that they were at bar and they left Tina behind.

Olivia cruises down to the Mata Hari bar to interview the bartender, Cecilia. She recognizes the photo of Tina and says that she left with a guy who was wasted and being a dick. Cecilia is hesitant to get involved but is eventually guilted into giving a description to a sketch artist by Olivia.

The sketch is released and amid all of the loonies that call in to report sightings Olivia gets a call from Cecilia. She says that the man who left with Tina is at the bar and they are alone and AAAAAAAAHHHHHH. Detectives Benson and Stabler arrive at the hipster bar and find the lights are still on and the air still reeking of Axe body spray. It is empty but they do find the Venus de Milo painted on the floor in blood. I am actually startled by the artist's ability because the blood painting is really good. I don't know how long it took Benson and Stabler to arrive but it looks like the blood painting took hours.

Back at the squad room a computer specialist (I am just assuming that because he is Asian) ran the blood image through "symbol recognition software" and it pulled up...Venus de Milo. Wow, what great software...I was able to recognize it as the Venus di Milo right off the bat and I don't know shit. He also did "a googlized power research session" and found out that numerous other Venus rip-offs have been done by Robert Morton. Robert is currently doing eight consecutive life sentences at Sing Sing prison for brutally torturing and killing women and leaving the corpses looking like...yep, you guessed it, the Venus di Milo. Depending on how dedicated this copycat killer is, the detectives figure they only have eight more hours to find Cecilia since Morton would kill his victims after 12 hours.

After a usual shift of rape kits, the detectives love a good field trip. So they head down to ol' Sing Sing to talk to the man himself. He is smug and elusive and I thought I detected a feminine lisp but it shouldn't surprise anyone since he is an artist. The detectives rifle through his mail but aren't allowed to touch the letters from his law office because it would violated murderer-attorney confidentiality. The letters they find lead them to a whole host of losers. Christ, I can't get anyone to even leave a response to my recaps and yet this guy cuts boobs and murders women and he has a giant fan club and a harem of "fiances". Leave a comment people or I will be forced to cut off one of my nipples.

The vice president of his fan club is a guy named "Jasper" and after the detectives lean on him a little he confesses to the killings. Too bad he didn't do it. District Attorney Novak found an alibi for Jasper. Olivia and Benson go back to the interrogation and find it awkward to be yelling "We know you DIDN'T kill her". He tells the detectives he knows about the crime scene because of a comic book that is sold that celebrates Morton's murders. The detectives note that the comic books portray thirteen murders and Morton only committed eight.

Benson and Stabler track down the comic book artist Harrison Thomas. Harrison is uptight and looks like a worm with a small tattoo on his neck. While Olivia is bashing Harrison's grisly muse, Detective Stabler searches through his junk and finds the comic book that portrays Cecilia's kidnapping. In the comic book, the murderer takes Cecilia back to his childhood home to do his carving. Knowing that 1 + 1 = 2, Olivia and Elliot head over to Morton's old home. They find Cecilia on a mattress bleeding from her chest. I am greatly concerned until I realize that her boobs are still intact. They made need some work but at least they are there.

Benson draws the short straw and gets to tell the now conscious Cecilia that she was loaded with GHB and had her sweater kittens carved up like a Thanksgiving turkey. Cecilia blames the detectives for getting her involved.

Back at the station Olivia is disappointed to learn that the comic book creep had an iron clad alibi. Poor Fin is walking around with a pizza box for Olivia and she doesn't want it and no one seems to know what to do with it. Poor Fin, Elliot and Olivia get to chase down the boob-cutter and he is left walking around with a pizza that no one seemed to have ordered. Finally, Chester Lake starts waxing poetic about his indian culture and about how "no part of this pizza shall go to waste" and takes it. An indian taking a hand-out? What? Chester tosses the pizza box on his desk and KABOOM. Fucking Pizza Hut, first they are stuffing pizza crust with nasty processed cheese and now bombs, where will this end? Luckily, no one was hurt (except by my insensitive joke about native americans).

The aftermath of the bomb is crazy. Captain Cragen threatens to pull off the case. Cragen, don't be a pussy. What, someone tried to kill a bunch of your detectives and you decide that maybe you shouldn't be investigating the crime? Um, they are trying to kill us so let's just forget the whole thing...hell, this is SVU, there has got to be a baby-raper somewhere around here we can go chase down. Chester is shaken up and half-heartedly protests being taken to the hospital with a concussion. Fin takes the cake though. This is why I love this character and why only Ice-T can play him so well. Fin commonly shakes off the fact that he nearly lost an ear and keeps his cool demeanor throughout. He walks off suddenly and when Cragen asks him where he is going he says, "Someone try to bust my eardrum so I'm gonna bust their ass". Love it. He doesn't know anything about the case but he just walks off and I would guess probably busts some ass on the way home just because he can.

Doc Sugar Ray shows up with some photos and says his analysis reveals her wounds were self-inflicted. I am no fan of emo, Alanis Morissette, or the petty troubles of pre-teen girls so I can't claim to understand "Cutters", but ladies, please keep the razor away from your boobs...you are going to need them one day. The detectives search her apartment and find that Cecilia works for Morton's law firm and had been using the confidentiality to correspond with Morton. The letters reveal an intimate and deranged relationship between the two of them.

Cecilia met Morton because her father did time with him and Morton did the whole pen-pal scam thing with her. They used her internship with the law firm to have private (i.e. conjugal) visits and correspondence. Morton happily admits to jail-humping his protege and leads the cops to the evidence (buried boobs).

Olivia is on her way home while Chester Lake watches the surveillance tape of the bombing. Chester notices a small tattoo on the pizza delivery guy's neck and calls Olivia to tell her. While she is still on the phone with Chester she walks into her apartment and gets attacked. Luckily, her attacker is a comic book artist so she easily kicks his ass.

Cecilia's defense attorney plans to get her off by proving that she is mentally ill and under the power of Morton. Cecilia's testimony is full of her insecurities, her dependence on booze and GHB, suicide attempts, cutting, and how much she loves Morton. If you were to substitute "taco bell" for "Morton" then it would be a pretty accurate description of my girlfriend. The icing on the cake is when the defense attorney asks Cecilia to show the jury her wound and she lifts up her shirt a la Girls Gone Wild. Spring Break!

Casey Novak makes a deal with Robert Morton. If he will testify that he never told Cecilia to kill someone then she will arrange for him to be transferred to the Federal Prison system which everyone knows has better accommodations and food than the ghetto-ass State Prison system. Once Morton takes the stand though it is a betrayal. Shocking, from a boob-mangling maniac. Robert happily tells everyone that he encouraged Cecilia to kill as a way of practicing her art. Novak senses his artist ego and uses it against Cecilia. She shows Morton a painting of the Tina Snow crime scene and asks him to critique it. He is very harsh on his young pupil and finally his insults become to much to bear and she freaks out and rushes the stand. She cries and tells him she loves him and he calls her a hack and laughs at her. His testimony was damaging to Novak's case but it is clear that Cecilia is guilty and she is sentenced to a mental health facility.

Morton is smug outside of the courtroom in custody in front of all his goddamn adoring fans (leave comments you bastards). Casey tells him that she is going to honor her promise to send him to a Federal Prison but he is going to a Supermax where he will be in isolation for 23 hours a day without visitors, books, or correspondence for the rest of his life.

Somewhere, Fin is walking down the street randomly busting people's asses because his ear hurts and he is still pissed.