Rock of Love - "Going to Ex-tremes" (Episode 209)

Now that Kristy Joe has left the mansion, the VH-1 producers ladies have to find a new villain - who will it be? Megan, Ambre, Destiney, Daisy or Jessica? Daisy is so happy to see Kristy Joe's empty bed and says it's a "beautiful day in Rock of Love Land." Big John gives the gals their note, which Daisy reads. Bret wants some honesty from the gals, and surprises the ladies by telling them that someone's getting eliminated that night. Bret feels he's gotten pretty close to the truth with of the ladies, but has invited some special friends to get to know a bit more about them. Bret said he's "bringing in the big guns" - otherwise known as the ladies' exes. Bret says the exes are the best way for him to see how the girls really behaved outside of his "house of lies."

Destiney's ex-hubby Adam shows up first. He looks like Dick Van Dyke in "Mary Poppins", I kept waiting for him to address Bret as "guv'nor", but sadly, he didn't. Megan looked nervous. Destiney's not worried about what her ex is going to say about her. Next up is Jessica's ex, Casey. Jess asked why the guy who showed up was the one who "treated me like crap." Cut to awful Megan, who still looks distressed. Or constipated. She's actually had this face quite a bit over the past few weeks. Megan's ex, Josh, who looks like a tool and honestly, not the kind of guy I'd see with Megan, enters next. According to Megan they dated for six months and he didn't want to leave the girl he was seeing to be her boyfriend. Smart man. Ambre's thinking her ex-fiance is coming through the door, but instead finds her best friend Adam. Bret couldn't get an of Ambre's exes to show, so she's definitely got the advantage here. Daisy only has one ex-beau and is not looking forward to seeing him. In walks Charles, who looks like a douche from head (hat that says "White Trash", jet black hair, guy liner, cheesy facial hair) to toe. Daisy admits that their relationship is a "complete roller coaster" - they've broken up and made up repeatedly. Bret has also brought a friend of his, who he felt has always had his back - last season's runner-up, stripper Heather. Destiney was excited to see her, as she thought she was a "wild child", Daisy was intimidated. Bret tells the ladies they are going to hang with Heather, who hopes they all brought their extra livers, while he grills the exes. Heather is going to help Bret with this week's elimination, by trying to get the dirt on the gals. Daisy's really nervous because she's got a secret about Charles she hasn't yet told Bret about. Uh-oh.

Heather's been in the house for about 2 minutes and she has alread got the gals doing body shots. She then gets them to take their tops off. Destiney loves her. Ambre feels like she's been thrown to the wolves, or rather, "the head wolf." Destiney suggests they all change into sexy outfits. Bret takes the boys to a cigar club to extract information about the ladies. Not the most talkative or open bunch, as no one was taking Bret up on his offer of cigars. Lots of awkward silence. Bret asks Adam abiut Ambre's "cheerleader-esque" disposition, and he tells Bret that she is genuine and sincere. He asks Casey about Jessica, who calls her the sweetest girl he'd ever meet. And you dumped her why, Casey? Oh, he wasn't ready for a serious relationship. Bret was worried that Jessica may be too innocent to live his rock n' roll lifestyle. Bret says he can't put his finger in on Megan and asks her ex about it. He says she's fun, but could be there (on the show) for publicity. Josh told Bret that Megan was already on a reality show (which we all knew already) so her intentions may not be pure.

Back at the skankery, Jessica wants to make a "good impression" on Heather, because she doesn't want to be perceived as too much of a good two shoes. Heather gets a moment with Megan and Jessica and asks them who they think should go home. They agree that Destiney is more of a rock star groupie than a potential love match for Bret. Heather says she recognizes Megan and asks where she may have seen her before. Megan 'fesses up that she was on "Beauty and the Geek" and Heather is delighted that she's getting all of this dirt for her man Bret. Heather brings the gals (and some more drinks) out to the hot tub. She starts asking Destiney about her favorite bands, which include Poison (of course) and Motley Crue. She was also in love with the drummer from some band. She is a rock star groupie. The ladies then play a rousing game of Truth or Dare, the highlight of which was Destiney doing naked cartwheels on the lawn.

Back at the cigar bar, the guys are starting to loosen up around Bret. Destiney's ex says that she "likes to party" and loves rock n' roll. Bret thinks she walks the fine line between "cool rocker chick" and "uber groupie." Bret asks Douchey McDoucherson about Daisy and he told him that they toured in a band together. Oh please, that girl is tone deaf, she must have played tambourine like the youngest daughter on "The Partridge Family" or something. Bret asks if he still has feelings for her or vice versa and he says he just wants her to be happy. Bret flat-out asked if they still had a physical relationship. Charles said no, but Bret saw him squirming. Bret vows to get to the bottom of this. Bret wanted to take the boys to a place where they could "liven it up a little bit." Titty bar?

Back at the house, the gals are still drinking and bonding. Megan says she feels that Jessica is too innocent and not prepared to live a rocker's lifestyle. Jessica felt betrayed by the girl she thought was her friend and started to cry. Heather took Jessica away for some one-on-one time and Jessica offered her all of the negatives of the other girls. Heather takes Destiney aside and asks about her love of the rockers. Destiney promises she's over her old beau from the band. Meanwhile, Jessica is getting stinking drunk. Daisy is falling apart. She's kicking herself for not talking to Bret about her little secret sooner. She grabs Heather and confesses that she and the douche still live together. In a one bedroom apartment. Throug her tears, Daisy says that they hadn't been physical for over 2 years, but no one seems to be buying it. Destiney, who overheard the conversation, was pissed that Daisy had been lying to Bret. Heather called her a trainwreck. Heather grabs Megan and pulls her into the bathroom to get her input on who should go. They're interrupted by Destiney, who suggests that Jessica is a worse match for Bret than Daisy, even though she's still shacked-up with the ex. Megan is delighted to hear this news.

Bret's idea to liven things up with the boys is to take them to Dave and Busters. I so wasn't expecting that. Nothing says male bonding better than skee ball. Bret is having a hard time eliciting sympathy from the guys whe n he asks then to imagine the difficulty in dating three beautiful women in the same night. Shut up, Bret. Before they head back, Bret pulls Charles the douche aside to get more info about Daisy. He asks if there's any kind of connection between them, and he tells him "Whassup."

Jessica is still upset that Megan tried to throw her under the bus. She's tired of hearing how sweet and innocent she was. She was particularly upset that Megan, the only one in the house she'd "pinky swear" with has betrayed her. Oh, and she's getting really hammered. It's then time for the drunk Jessica show. She alternately cries, sloppily eats a sandwich and then throws up. The other gals are having a problem getting her to lie down. Bret comes back and can't find his girls. He ventures upstairs and finds them doing some drunk wrangling. Jessica runs up and hangs all over Bret, showering him with puke-scented kisses. Ewww.

Daisy talks to Charles to find out what he said to Bret. He didn't give up much information. Bret and Heather join up and talk about who Bret needs to eliminate. Heather says Jessica is "very young" and Bret finally wises up and realizes she may be too oung for him. Heather tells Bret about Megan's reality show past, which jives with what the ex told him. He noted that Megan's facial expresion never changes (we all knew that too) but Heather said she had a nice rack. Downstairs, Megan discovered that her ex was only there to promote his bar (if you hadn't pointed it out, Megan, we never would have known...dumb ass) and, realizing he still didn't care about her, was deelpy upset. I guess she was upset, she made the same facial expression but said she was deeply upset. She went off to talk to Ambre about the situation. Ambre was surprised to see Megan crying, because she never had before and was coincerned that she's never shed a tear for Bret, but was boo-hooing over her ex. She feels compelled to tell Bret about this before elimination. I now love our little soccer mom. Bret asks Heather about Ambre and she asys she likes her, but their lifestyles wouldn't mesh. On to Destiney - Heather says she just wants to date a rock star. Bret agrees. Heather says she has the biggest problem with Daisy, especially because she still lives with the ex. Bret's surprised to hear that, and has a slightly hard time believing that they're just friends. Bret pulls the couple aside to get to the bottom of things. Daisy tells Bret that the physical relationship was long over and Charles says he's "cool" with Bret hooking up with Daisy. Jessica has no idea what she said and did but promises to make it to elimination. Bret thanks the boys for hanging and sends them away before elimination.

Ambre grabs Bret before elimination to tell him what she saw with Megan. Bret said the news was eye-opening. He said that news kicked him "right in the 'nards" and asked Big John to bring Megan to his room. Megan tried to distract Bret from the issue at hand by kissing on him. She denied that she still had feelings for the ex. Bret's not sure what to believe, and says this elimination is going to be tough.

It's elimination time. Destiney's confident, Daisy's worried. Jessica is happy that she rallied. Ambre is also pretty confident because she didn't get sloppy drunk, isn't a stripper and doesn't live with her ex. Bret starts dispensing the passes. Ambre gets the first pass. I still don't see her with him. She's just too well-adjusted. Destiney gets pass number 2, followed by Daisy, who sas there's more she needs to tell Bret - say hello to our new villain.         

It's down to Jessica and Megan and her one facial expression. Much to my delight, Bret sends awful Megan packing. Ding, dong the bitch is dead! She's not taking the rejection well, and refuses to leave the house. Bret finally walks her out of the house, but she won't give him a goodbye kiss. Oh, just leave already! Next week, the remaining gals - and Heather hit Sin City. I wonder if Bret's going to pull a Flavor Flav and get Heather back into the competition. Those two really deserve each other. I can't wait for next week!