Life On Mars: Out Here in the Fields (Episode 101)

"You're some bottom-feeding thug that crawled out of some dark pit in the recesses of my mind."

Let's get a couple things clear, yeah?

I adore the original Life on Mars. I think John Simm is awesome He rocks Spy's world.

Now that that's out here, I will try to be as unbiased as possible about Life on Mars US. I'm going to try not to compare every single scene to the original episode.

The key world there is 'try.' I'm not promising anything.

I'm in England (no really, I'm on vacation) where I'm recovering from a night spent on the floor of a public toilet throwing up because I shouldn't have gone drinking with the English.

But what a better time to do this recap.

We start with the obligatory establishing shots that lets us know we're in New York First smart thing they did from the original premiere. LA? Seriously? First thing about LOM - no sun, ever. We need lots for grey for the leather jacket.

Sam and Cosby Kid Maya are on the way to a scene (note the sirens) so it's a great time to have a relationship discussion.

This is called establishing the relationship like New York, but with less skyscrapers. Turns out Maya is holding something against Sam while said while either drunk or horny. Sam doesn't really protest that much about meeting her parents and instead says he's crazy about her. Crazy being the general theme of the show.

Right, so now we're watching the take down of Colin Raimes I'm really not going to describe this as it's your standard chase the bad guy down, blah, blah, dustbin cover to the face, blah, blah, handcuffs. and the interrogation.

Now, if you've seen the original, you know what happens next. If you don't, Raimess' attorney pulls out a tape that shows that Raimes couldn't have been the serial killer because while the victim was being killed, he was off gambling in a casino which ended up with him being filmed on CCTV.

Maya stalks the freed Raimes through a park and she and Sam have another relationship chat. Then, in a soap-opera-worthy moment we learn that Raimes has a twin brother named Laurence Raimes, a degenerate gambler (who was on the CCTV).

Oooh! Drama!

As expected, when Sam rushes to the park, he only finds Maya's blood-stained white shirt.

Cue montage of Sam driving with angst and some Bowie.

Yes, that song.

And he gets hit by a car.

More Bowie.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ <---- time travel squiggles

Well, at least the leather jacket is black. (Beige, my ass.)

Sam wakes up confused and sees an orange car with black racing stripes. He peers in it only to see an eight track with another Bowie song, maybe not so aptly named 'Hunky Dory.'

While Sam is being confused, a beat cop comes by to bark at him about parking. Sam denies ownership of the car and comments about jeeps and cells. Yes, this is tedious but it's being used to set the fact that Sam does have a presence and legal identity wherever he is. Yes, we all know he's in 1973, but let's pretend we don't know yet. It'll make Sam feel better.

Well, until he turns around and sees the twin towers of the World Trade Center. I'm Canadian and while I understand intellectually the horror of that day, I don't have the emotional tie to the Towers as the intended audience.

But now Sam knows it's time for the 'What the fuck?!?!?! moment.

Title sequence. The BBC's was better.

Random comment. At least the pants are red, or is that brown? Sam walks around a lot more getting more and more confused. He finds his cop ID and goes to the station. There he (and we) get to experience of some serious old-school police equipment. You know the CSIS on Vegas, Miami and New York would just cry if they saw this shit.

US Chris comes by followed by US Ray really for no other reason that to walk them across the screen so we can see they're there, and to further establish Sam's credentials - yeah, he's from Hyde (which is upstate now). For the record, there are places called Hyde in:

Pennsylvania
North Carolina
South Dakota

Sam gets all ranty, demanding an answer for this bullshit only to be slapped down by the man who is old enough to qualify for the AARP. I mean, we're supposed to believe this guy is in the prime of his booze-soaked life?

Uh, the fan is a bit much, even for Keitel/The Boss/Gene Hunt, but don't worry, Gene shows us he's a man's man when Sam gets a punch in the gut. (That's a sign of love, really)

Sam tries to reach Maya, but the operater thinks he's nuts and soon so does he when he hears the sound of medical equipment.

Much screaming ensues. Ray, being his charming self deems Sam crazy and decides he needs to see No Nuts.

Enter Annie Norris. Huh, I think I have that same skirt, pockets and all. No Nuts Norris gives us her story - she's basically the housewife of the police force.

Sam gets an intro to the era's blatant sexism when Gene and the boys take him along to a crime scene (Dead twirl, no sexual assault, etc.) The description is exactly like the current case Sam's working on, so he wonders if that's why he's in 1973. Gene makes it all about him, and tells Chris and Ray to take Sam to the slab.

Sam tries to use his forensic mojo, but the other guys are all, "What? Dude, what are you on?"

Btw, smoking over the body is just so respectful, isn't it?

Turns out the victim was held for 30 hours without food and really, who cares because Sam is stressing out again. Ray tries to be helpful in only a way Ray can be - it includes booze and an airplane hostess.

Sam instead goes for the tweezers and grabs a hair.

Scene change. Yeah, I would jump too if I was having a great dream involving my partner only to have Harvey Keitel walk in. If this was the original LOM, this would have been the jumping off point for some jealous!Gene slash fic

Sam is still insisting that the serial killer took a 35-year break, but even he doesn't need to see the looks on his team's face to realize that yes, his theory is a bit stupid.

Annie No Nuts gets the job of taking him home to his new flop and we get another montage of life in 1973 New York

(This is like the aerial shots of Torchwood in Season one. I'll wait a couple more episodes before berating the directors.)

Random note: Damn, those clothes were ugly. Just like his apartment. It's a dive - the bathroom is down the hall. Annie even unpacked his clothes. She really is the housewife of the department.

Sam gives us his three theories - he's a time traveller, he's crazy or he's in a coma in a hospital.

Ok, side note. I still miss John Simm.

Moving on. Sam unburdens to Annie, who doesn't take him seriously, but uses her psych degree to rationalize his feelings and circumstances.

Annie makes a crack about letting his hand linger on her chest, but by the angst on his face, Sam's not thinking about her breasts.

Oh, science guy on TV. Science guy tells us that Sam is in a low responsive, but not persistently vegetative state. Sam shouts and paws at the tv.

We switch to the interrogation scene and a view of the totally illegal awesome techniques used by Gene.

Well, at least Dora and I agree. Gene is ugly. Not well-aged like Glenister, who was good looking when he was younger. Keitel just looks like he's going to keel over and break his hip. He could hold it together with that tie.

Sam gets kicked out and goes to the bar. Nelson is from Poughkeepsie.

Gene comes in to rub in his awesome techniques. Sam tries to use logic and modern-day forensics. Gene just laughs.

Gene gives him his work philosophy and even gives Sam a chance to use his skills to find the killer. This includes a quick history in profiling, which is only there for more sexist comments against Annie. Oh, and the emotional connection between Sam and Annie. They have a moment over the imagined death of a girl and then Annie tells him to never do that again. Sam brings out his inner feminist by saying, "What? Ask you to use your brain for five minutes."

Random note, not Bowie, but why use Teenage Wasteland, the same song used for CSI NY?

Annie explains for us what it's like as a woman of the time. I quite like the explanation. Theory is ok, but living it is something else.

Another montage with a Wizard of Oz reference.

LOL! Aw, Sam wants to impress Annie by the quick change from Hall and Oates to Zepplin album. Sam possibly ruins the future by telling her about CDs. The record store conveniently gives Sam the next clue - insulation.

Chris comes up with something to move the plot along. Mrs. Raimes, the grandmother of Colin Raimes, made a complaint about a neighbour. Granny dear is trying to distract them by raving about the coffee and the cookies. Sam's method isn't working, so Gene buys her expensive cookies and feeds her booze. Hell, even before she drinks the booze-laced coffee she's spilling the beans on her downstairs neighbour Willie Kramer. He plays his phonograph (record player) all night long.

Sam and Gene share a significant look. Then, wait for it - the leap over the desk! Not as dramatic as the original, but I'll take it.

Gene and Sam head over to Willie's place, see the room covered in insulation and rescues Dora. Willie comes home, sees the cops and a hilarious chase scene ensues to the song "Little Willy" by Sweet.

Willie holds a gun on Sam while Sam tries to talk him down. Sam thinks Willie might be the key to sending him back to 2008 and encourages Willie to shoot him.

Then Gene and Ray kicks Willie's ass.

This time Sam's crazy is deemed good. Sam sees Willie being waved at by two redheaded children - Colin and Laurence Raimes. Sam puts the pieces together and with a brief conversation with Annie, he walks away into a another montage, this time set to the Rolling Stones. He does drive by to watch Colin Raimes play with kids. He warns Colin, who is a child, so I'm not sure if Sam's action will help Maya in the future.

Then it's not so much taking to Colin as it's taking to himself. Then Maya's voice comes over the radio, encouraging Sam to come home. Sam angsts, but is distracted by Chris calling him on a new case.

Sam drives away with sirens blazing and Mick Jagger wailing.

The recapper is feeling: a sense of deja vu.