House: Birthmarks (Episode #604)

Hi all! Christine has given up our favorite crazy doc, so I will be your new recapper! As a more recent fan of House (thanks to USA's reruns...) I am happy to take the show off her hands! Especially with Tuesday's episode, seeing how it was a great one.  Dr. House has lost his father, who it seems, he couldn't care less about.  Nothing like a Chinese-American women vomiting blood to take your mind off the death of the man who partly gave you life.  At least, that's what everyone thinks.

After searching for her birth parents in China, Nicole finds them, only to have them deny ever having a daughter.  Heartbroken, she wishes upon Buddah to have her parents want her.  When she learns her wish may come true, she falls to the ground and begins throwing up blood.  Never a good sign.  House collects the team to discuss a possible diagnosis.  However, when the team learns House's father died, they're more concerned about him calling his mother than their dying patient. Another bad sign...

Nicole's adoptive parents are rightfully concerned.  A search of her apartment finds pills galore and alcohol, which she was supposed to have quit drinking.  Diagnosis #1: SARS.  Any of you who watch House should know it takes at least three diseases before House gets it right.  SARS just happened to be the first.  Sadly, her parents want house to tell their daughter her sickness is caused by alcohol.  Therefore she may be scared enough to stop drinking. House is absolutely disgusted by this.  And obviously, he makes his feelings known.

House's favorite (and only) boss Cuddy is one smart women.  She tells House he has to have a vaccine because he has come into contact with Nicole.  After telling him to drop trou, she sticks him in the ass and tells him his father's funeral is the next day, and his mom would like him to deliver the eulogy.  Thirty seconds later, House passes out.  Meanwhile, Nicole is getting worse.  It isn't SARS because she now has liver failure.  On to diagnosis #2...

House awakes in the passenger seat of a moving car.  Wilson's car to be exact.  Though they aren't the best of friends anymore (if they ever were) Wilson was recruited by Cuddy to make sure House attends, and speaks at, his father's funeral.  This should be a fun road trip.

Obviously when House wakes up he immediately wants his Vicoden, which Wilson has so cleverly stolen.  He opens the bottle and gives ONE to House, who takes it, but wants more.  Suddenly, House has to pee, now. Right now.  So he grabs an empty water bottle because Wilson refuses to stop to House can run.  Wilson stops.  Terrible idea.

Diagnosis #2: blood clot.  Which she had, but that isn't what is killing her.  Chase removes the clot and all seems well for the time being.  Until Nicole takes it upon herself to go outside for a smoke.  Kutner finds her just in time, her wound is bleeding and won't stop.  He rushes her back inside and the team comes up with diagnosis #3: cancer.  What kind? Not sure yet...

While the team tries to find a tumor, House is busy driving Wilson crazy.  Although he seems to be enjoying it, he stops when House knocks the car keys out off his hand and into the sewage drain.  House is really trying to miss this funeral.  Wilson grabs a flashlight and asks House to hold it while he looks for the keys.  In true House fashion, he drops the flashlight down the drain too.  He's no match for Wilson though, who nabs the keys anyways.  Off to the funeral.

While riding, House's phone rings (with a ring tone of "MmmBop," I may add) and it's the team telling House about the cancer.  House, being the ass he is, uses his cane to accelerate Wilson's car past a cop, who then pulls them over.  Apparently Wilson has a warrant for his arrest in Louisiana (thanks to House) and the two are arrested.  Wilson tries to explain the incident to the Sheriff which includes Wilson getting mad at some guy at the bar for playing a song over and over again.  When he asked the guy to stop and the guy refused, Wilson through a beer bottle at an antique mirror and started a bar brawl.  House bailed him out of jail, mainly because they were at a boring medical convention and he needed someone to drink with.  Which is also the story of how the two met.  Aww...gotta love bromance.

Diagnosis #4: gallstones.  While the team deals with that, House and Wilson are dealing with House's daddy issues.  Turns out, House hasn't thought his father was his real father since he was 12 years old.  Wilson is beginning to get a better understanding of why House is the way he is.  Not that he likes him anymore because of that, especially after the funeral.  House's mother delayed the funeral until his arrival, and subsequently threw him up on stage to give a euglogy.  After many back handed compliments and just plain rude statements, House acts as though he is breaking down.  Wilson knows better, and approaches House just as he is clipping his father's fingernail for a DNA test.  

Now if that wasn't twisted enough, turns out Nicole's birthparents tried to kill her by putting pins her brain.  Diagnosis #5 (and the right diagnosis): pins? OK weird.  Anyway, the pins will be removed and she will be fine.  But will House? After arriving back from the funeral, Wilson comes into House's office to tell him he is coming back to the hospital.  House then tells Wilson that he got the DNA results back; and it was not his father.  House then realizes his grief as he and Wilson walk out, together.