Dirty Sexy Money: The Plan (Episode 208)

We are amping up the melodrama this week. And if you didn't think that was possible anymore on this show, let me introduce you to the Darlings, again. Let's break it down by sibling, shall we?

Jeremy: continues to obsess about whether or not Nola Lyons is the most into him, especially given how she's treating him as the hired help around Pat's office. Which he is, but that's never stopped Jeremy before. Remember when he used to valet? Yeah, me neither. Karen and Letitia tell him that if Nola's always telling him that she has feelings for him but can't be with him because "it's complicated," it means she's seeing someone else. So Jeremy follows her and sees her getting into Simon Elder's car; she's only been stealing Senate documents about why approval for his biofuel died in committee, not sleeping with him as Jeremy assumes. When Jeremy confronts her, Nola, at the end of her rope, admits that her dad owed Simon something, and he's taking it out on her and her brother, who he is holding hostage somewhere. Jeremy tells Nola he's going to fix it, but she begs him to stay out of it, because of how Simon is totes evil. Jeremy ignores her and goes to Nick, who the Darlings believe can turn lead to gold, telling him Nola is in trouble, but before he can elaborate, Simon shows up. Later, Simon threatens Nola over her lack of self-control.

Brian: battles with God. No, really. Andrea's lying in the hospital, trying to convince Brian that she's really dying, that he needs to accept it, that he needs to be able to tell their son. He decides to quit Darling Enterprises, since he thinks it's clear he has no place in the company. Tripp barely protests, and Brian returns to the hospital, where he runs into his old Bishop, who reminds him that his six months' penitential retreat is up. The Bishop asks if Brian might come back, if Andrea's illness isn't God's way of calling him back to the ministry. Brian says God can't be calling back if Brian never called Him in the first place. He does, however, make a stop at the church to rail at God for a while" "This is what you do. You bring us into this world. You make it incredibly hard to feel at home here. And then right when we finally realize that this is where we want to be, you force us out. All part of yoru wonderful, unknowable plan." He says that Andrea might think she's ready to die, he's not, and neither is Junior. He says that Andrea has more left to do--he asks a reprieve, maybe K-12. It was just starting to get good, he says. He tells Jesus that if he wants Brian back, he has to step up and show him what He can do for Brian. And when he returns to the hospital, it seems Andrea's started to improve. Her white count is up; she's getting a little better. Brian returns to the church and looks to Christ again: "You friggin' win." He tells the Bishop he's back, having had a revelation. And he wants the Bishop's job.

Patrick: is about to be inaugurated. However, Ellen's brother Chase has started to mouth off at Darling Aeronautics about how the family killed Ellen. His wife has left him, and he feels as though he's sold his soul by accepting help from the Darlings instead of exposing them. Nick tries to talk to Chase again, try to reason with him, but Chase has gone off the reservation. He feels he's sould his soul in taking the Darlings' cash instead of exposing them, and he wants to rectify that mistake. He appeals to Carmelita, asking her to join him in telling the world how Pat killed Ellen. Carmelita immediately goes to Patrick, thus sending him into blissful spasms of daydreams about having her at his inauguration, but her warning at least gets through. Tripp and Nola discuss having Chase committed to a 72-hour psychiatric lockdown, at least until after Pat's senatorial inauguration. Nick wants one last chance to reason with him, but during his heart-to-heart with Ellen's crazyass brother, in which he says he knows how weird it is to be in the Darling world, and how Chase should just cut and run and get his family back, the police show up to cart Chase away. Chase loses it, thinking that Nick has set him up, luring him in with the promise of help only to turn him over when he's let his guard down. Nick loses it at Tripp, who insists that he had nothing to do with the whole shenanigan. But he's a good liar, so it might not just be Nola's fault, as he claims. Pat meanwhile gets back in Carmelita's good books and arranges for her to be at his side when he's inaugurated. The 'do is planned on the steps of a federal building in New York, which is rather ostentatious for a freshman senator, but that's how the Darlings do. Chase is brought to the hospital for holding, where he manages to overcome the cop that has him in custody and drive away in the police van.

Karen: has purged her closet of things that remind her of Simon, as is her traditional post-matrimony ritual. Nick reinstates her shares of Darling Enterprises, but Karen is riding the Bitter Train all the way to Conflicted Town, especially when Nick tells her that even if he did gross things like betray her trust, he did it because he cares about her. Which Letitia tells her also, saying that it's Simon who was poison and that Nick has always had Karen's best interests at heart. Put your resentment aside, Mom says, and go see Nick. So Karen goes to Nick's apartment, only to find the door open and no one home. Except Chase, who she doesn't immediately remember until he tells her that he's Ellen's brother. She reacts the way we all do when we remember someone, with the whole big arms big smile "Oh, right!" thing, until she remembers the other part of the equation: "I'm so sorry about her." Natalie Zea is SO excellent in this role. After an awkward moment, Karen decides to leave, but then Chase pulls out the gun that he stole from the police officer he attacked and points it right in Karen's face. Chase complains for a while about how the Darlings perpetuate a lie to the public that money makes you happy, and Nick is the worst of all, tying it up in a bow like Christmas morning. Karen starts to defend him until she remembers the gun, and Chase says he knew she had a thing for Nick, thansk to Ellen. Who hated Karen, btw. Karen: "Well, that's disappointing, I always thought of her as a friend." Chase calls Karen a slut, which, if you weren't already afraid something superbad was going to happen to Karen, the look of recognition on her face and the implication of what comes after that remark hits it home. Chase gets a call on his cell, and Karen makes a break for the door. But Chase catches her and cracks the butt of his gun on Karen's temple.

At the inauguration, Pat has Carmelita at his side. Nick gets a call from his home phone; it's Karen, bleeding and barely conscious. She's only able to say his name before she passes out again. Nick asks Tripp where his daughter is; he thinks she's with Letitia. Outside, Nola finds Jeremy, who's trying to find Nick to tell him about what's going on with Nola. She tries to run after him, but being Chief of Staff, she's waylaid. Amid the crowd, Chase walks like the creepy creepster he is, dressed in his stolen police uniform. Nick finds Tish, deep in the drink, who tells him that Karen went to see him at his apartment. Tripp at that moment arrives to tell them that Chase escaped his police escort. Nick sends the cops to his apartment and starts running to shut down the whole inaugural affair. Pat's making his appearance, front and center, when Nick runs down the front steps. Jeremy runs up to him to talk, but Nick bruhes him off. Tish and Tripp appear on the steps as well. Nick tells the Chief of Police they have a security threat and they need to shut it down. In the crowd, Nick sees Chase. "Gun! Gun! Everybody down!" Chase raises the pistol; Nick throws Jeremy out of the line of fire; Jeremy rolls down the front stairs like a dummy and lands with a sickening thud; Nick throws himself at Chase and knocks him to the ground as the first shot rings out; guards pull Pat down; Nick and Chase struggle for the gun; Chase wins, pushing Nick aside; Chase shoots once; twice; the end.