Original Air Date: March 12, 2007

Lauren goes over the plans for New Year's Eve with Audrina:

• Lo is coming up with a bunch of other friends from Laguna. Lauren hasn't spoken to Lo for two years because of something to do with Jen.
• They're going out in a big group which will eventually include Spencer and Heidi.
• While the girls are going out together in a limo, Spencer is not allowed in the car with them.

The girls go over the plan with Whitney, who remembers that she kissed three guys last New Year's Eve. Don't know if any of them will do a three-peat, but it should be a good time.

Original Air Date: March 5, 2007

Spencer wants to get away with Heidi, but Heidi wants to stick around to spend more time with Lauren. Even after that awful fight in last week's ep, she still thinks Lauren will come around. Really? Okay. Spencer convinces her (with much smoochage) to come to Santa Barbara.

At Teen Vogue, Whitney and Lauren are given a new assignment: assist visiting Vogue editor Lisa Howell with a shoot featuring young L.A. Whitney immediately suggests her younger sister for the job -- as long as she passes the casting process, Lisa Love reminds her, and Lauren promises to get her sister in for an interview. Back in the fashion closet, Whitney says that she's interned for Teen Vogue for five summers, and has worked countless shoots. Will Lisa Howell be as strict as someone who has worked for Anna Wintour?, they wonder. They don't wonder for long, as Howell comes in to remind them that they have to keep the kids organized, make sure the clothes are kept in order and returned in perfect condition, and that the shoot begins at 8:00 AM. Howell has this kind of stare that made me want to sit up straight and run a comb through my hair, so imagine what working for her must be like? Whitney is ready to be something other than someone's intern.

Original Air Date: February 26, 2007

Lauren and Audrina are making dinner. Lauren says her friendship with Heidi is fine, but only as long as she and Heidi don't talk about Spencer. Going back to season 1 with Heidi's then-boyfriend Jordan, Lauren remembers that Heidi made time for the two of them, always making sure that there were "Lauren and Heidi" days. Since she's been back with Spencer, she's barely seen Heidi at all. And where is Heidi? She's at Lisa Kline with Jen, who wants to be set up with Brody.

Original Air Date: February 19, 2007

Over coffee, Lauren expresses her concerns about Heidi getting back together with Spencer. Seeing so much of Jason's manipulative qualities in him, Lauren can't help but express her misgivings about Spencer but at the same time is concerned that speaking out will cause tension between her and Heidi. For Heidi's sake, Lauren hopes he's changed, but isn't confident that Heidi should give him a second chance. A bit more brusquely, Lauren doesn't want to hear about Spencer, won't hang out with him, but she will be there when Spencer screws Heidi over. Because she's convinced that he absolutely will.

The third seasons of MTV's "The Hills" and Showtime's "Weeds" are tonight. Note that tonight's "Hills" is a double ep. And as a special treat, I will finally be recapping the remaining eight episodes of season 2. You know, the ones I was supposed to do back in the, *gulp*, spring. Recaps of eps 1 through 4 of season 2 are here. Look for recaps of tonight's episodes to be posted late tonight or sometime tomorrow.

Original Air Date: February 12, 2007

The morning after Area, Heidi is still incredulous. When did she get so jealous? Lauren wants to know, as does Heidi. Heidi's incredulity turns to outright anger after Audrina tells her that Spencer brought roses to their little "date" at Pinkberry only to hook up with Heidi that night after Area. Heidi gets Spencer on speakerphone and confronts him, egged on by Lauren and Audrina. Spencer immediately gets on the defensive and tries to do damage control, but Heidi's heard enough. How can she start fresh with Spencer when stories like this get back to her. Should she really be with someone who, as Lauren says, can manipulate her like that?

Should it be "Whom do you trust?" I'm probably wrong, as I wasn't an English major in college, and I would rather poke myself with a sharp stick before attempting to diagramming a sentence. Grammar aside, there are some relationship issues to resolve -- between Heidi and Audrina, Lauren and Brody and, most obviously, between Heidi and Spencer.

OMG, new season of "The Hills"! I kinda missed this show. Sure, I got tired of feeling jealous of Lauren's apartment, boyfriend, car, wardrobe, job, whatever, but I really grew to like her. You'd get the feeling that she was kinda passive, not being too chatty (that's what roommate Heidi was for) and all, but her heavily lined eyes said so much!

Like France, I took the month of August off. I probably should have something earlier, so you might have a chance to watch the shows mentioned below for yourselves. Or at least write the editor of this charming site and have him yell at me to:

1. Watch the shows I was assigned/volunteered to cover.
2. Write recap.

Simple, no?

After 8 months of love on "The Hills", Heidi is tired of Jordan treating her badly. He yells, he's not nice to her, doesn't treat her like the princess she feels she is. Over lunch, Heidi relates this to Audrina, who expresses the sort of dull concern I've come to expect from someone who seems dull in comparison to her heavy eye makeup.